Reflection on 2022

Looking for love and a new day; Seeing with more than our eyes.

Michael Nesmith ft. The First National Band - Calico Girlfriend, 1970

An awfully good year, with lots of beautiful memories. But tell me, what starts but does not end?

Reading N.E. Pasaribu’s “happy stories”, K. Saroso’s life story from Salemba’s medical campus to political camps, C.J. Koch’s “fictionalized” 1964-1965 life in Jakarta as someone who profits from Dollar Hegemony, and lastly, Amartya Sen’s memoir. These books are great precisely because they provide an actual frame of reference, not something that was made on an armchair dictating what is good and what is not good.

Four books are an awfully low number for a year, and my only explanation for it is the tragedy of the once-free freshmen. As I recall in my first semester, my habit of waking up and reading my books under the sunlight of Priok was slowly eroded by the numerous tasks of a freshman, a fool’s errand if I may. Once the freshman ceremony was completed, it didn’t end; it just warped into numerous homework with tight deadlines.

Slowly, my friends and I adapted to it. We thought that it was maybe just an online thing; the professors didn’t know how to make sure that we were understanding the materials as they rarely saw our faces during lectures. We were right.

As 2022 started, the pandemic was slowing down. Offline classes were on the mind of the faculty and they went with it. Of 6 classes, 3 were conducted offline: Vibrations and Waves, Quantum Physics, and Advanced Physics Lab. Those days were weirdly nice. I remember that my friends and I spend many nights at the university’s dorm, studying. Funnily, during one of those nights I erroneously drank coffee and an energy drink, the result was felt tomorrow and my esophagus was burned; luckily I went to the university’s hospital the same day and they gave me a syrup that healed me.

Now, the first part of 2022 (fifth semester) was fun, but there was just one problem. I was working full-time. Ever since January and now, I was working at a company in Boston remotely. They have meetings on Mondays and Fridays, at 12 AM. I leave my fate to the Almighty for time management was not something that was in my power. During my first semester, I had many errands that withhold me from what I enjoy, reading. During my fifth semester, I had a job that was my priority and thus I couldn’t do reading as actively as I used to.

In some way, one can feel withheld by a job that conflicts with time, but it is that conflict with the time that is the reason why one profits from the Hegemony. A rich kid who lives in Cikini and studies for an IUP Law degree is vividly foreign to blue-collar workers, as their privileges would be something that can only be reached in dreams.

One last thing related to the hegemony. I lost a lot of money on October 2021 during which I was at Pandawa Beach. A 17-year-old kid, losing a lot of money, I didn’t even know how many years I had to save to get it back; little did I know it would take less than a month’s salary from the job I got in January.

Then in my birth month (March), I went back to Bali and bought tickets before I knew my offline classes would be held on that very month too. I look at Bali and the foreign people there. The merchants at the Uluwatu temple were relentless. Drivers confided how the people of Bali suffered badly as tourism was their main source of income. I remember getting a Gelato and then passing by Padma Beach (a hotel that is renowned for its price, I obviously did not stay there).

Social inequality and overexploitation are important, but we must not fall into the trap that is viewing any human by their class, we must only view them as human in their full essence of individuality. In early November, I was invited by a dear friend of mine (Chris Wibisana) to go to Ms. Julia Suryakusuma and sort the books in her library out, I saw a lot of Reformation-era (1998 to 2004) while I was there and with sadness, I look at what was left of the failed project. Ms. Julia with kindness lend me a book that was in possession of her family’s collection. It is not a novel but a collection of passages from many divine books.

It is with this year too, that I considered my most-loving year. Sweet memories that affirm the writings of Umair Haque. It is indeed, the greatest joy of being a person and being alive, and all grace go to her, kabogoh akang.

Going into the new year and the next semester, my friends and I were approved for a Google program that offers certificates and 20 credits. It’s a new challenge rather than the usual of the pen, paper, and glass board; bits of excitement can be said. Jesus asked us to pray for our daily bread, an amount that is enough by human standards.

Aku telah membuat segalanya baik dan indah dan menitahkan kepada manusia untuk memelihara alam itu sebaik-baiknya. Pada mulanya manusia taat. Mereka hidup sederhana. Kalaupun mereka menebang beberapa batang pohon, itu karena mereka membutuhkan sepetak lahan untuk menanam umbi-umbian. Kalaupun mereka membunuh seekor dua ekor hewan, itu karena mereka membutuhkan makanan selain yang mereka tanam. Pada mulanya ada kedamaian, lambat laun terjadi pertikaian antara kelompok yang satu dengan yang lain, sehingga terjadi perebutan lahan. Itulah awal disharmoni yang dalam perjalanan waktu, selama berpuluh abad berkembang menjadi peperangan-peperangan yang memakan korban berjuta-juta manusia.

Page 310, Kelindan Asa dan Kenyataan, Mia Bustam, 2022